Education Sadness and Frustration

After reading hundreds of tweets from the MLA convention, I am convinced that higher education has nothing to do with undergraduate students. My undergraduate education existed as a tool to fund graduate studies.

I keep thinking about the idea of breaking boundaries between teachers/facilitators and students. I also keep thinking about the idea of learning for the sheer sake of learning. I've been going through lists of courses at Mason; I wonder if I emailed professors if any would be receptive to letting me sit in on a class for the semester...? I tried emailing a professor from Columbia University that wrote encouraging articles last semester but he returned my email with a very high-and-mighty professional no. I've also looked at sites like p2pu.com but not found what I was looking for. I can't help but think that resources would be easier to come across if I actually lived in the DC area; something I can't afford right now.

I have so many thoughts on higher education because of all the blogs and tweets I read but I feel like my thoughts are so much smaller and simpler than those of the PhD folks that are using words like PEDAGOGY or POLITICAL ECONOMY or HEGEMONY or DIGITAL HUMANITIES. All the while I am feeling more and more self-conscious because of the fact that I live in a rural town, I live with my mom, and I work in childcare coupled with the fact that educated people don't want to have anything to do with me. (This is not a perception; my emails and calls mostly go ignored.)

What can I do to change things? How can I infiltrate this snarky, snobby world of higher education, learn the language and culture, be accepted, then translate that knowledge into something useful and understandable to other people outside of academia? Isn't that how things should work? Furthermore, shouldn't those playing the role of the student have a say in all of the fluffy stuff padding their education?

I guess I'm just sad because I'm on the outside.