Yesterday was a whirlwind of feelings; waking up at home, eating at a favorite restaurant, going on a date, having that date go ridiculously sour, having drinks at a bar with a cat, being social at a friend's stand up comedy event, and finally, topping all that off with an Olivia show. Seeing Olivia is always both comfortable and awkward at the same time but since all the bad stuff with grad school and relationships occurred last year, there are also feelings of sadness and bitterness. Maybe that's just a testament to the music, though; terrible things can happen but they don't seem to keep me away. I can feel awkward -- and gosh, I know I look awkward with my books and camera -- but I just deal with it and translate what I'm feeling into something slightly more tangible.
A lot of people associate music with bad feelings and things; that's normal. Thing is, music for me is people. I feel bad that I put so much meaning on music as a whole -- the music, the places, the roadtrips, the people, the experiences -- because the negative associations bleed into all of it. I guess I'm just not comfortable talking openly about it but Olivia reminds me of my various identities, what it was like to be happy, and what it looked like to appear normal (or at least socially acceptable).
The rest of the photos can be found
here.
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